Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Randomize
