thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Porn is love you can see.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize