he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
