Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Damn victory sex feels great
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