If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
