My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Randomize
