Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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