She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
