one two three fourrrrnication!
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
