Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
