I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
