oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
