I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
