My pussy is not your playground.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I enjoy the company of your penis
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize