Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
