Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
