i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
