Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
