I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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