YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
