i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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