Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I met the friendliest cop last night
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Randomize
