is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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