He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
