Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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