Where is the hickey?
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
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