sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
