Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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