why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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