wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Randomize
