just come out here and I will go home with you...
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
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