I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
