Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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