Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
40s are totally the cure
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize