Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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