New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
