She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Randomize
