Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
