She's JV to your varsity
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
