there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
