how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
