How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
