come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
