Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Randomize
