I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
