it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
