You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
