the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
