best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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