Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
