Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
