Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
